21. Speaking Silence..

Farah came home at her usual timings, i.e 5 pm, winding up the normal routine work, she cooked dinner, it was almost 8, there were still  time for Wali to come home, so she decided to catch up on a novel. Grabbing a cup of coffee, she opened Harry Potter, book 7, her all-time favorite, she could read this series endlessly and she had even lost the count how many times she had read the books. She was skimming through the novel, when she heard the door click, she jumped, closing the book, and as expected it was Wali.

"aj jaldi a gaye?", she hugged him, questioning, as it was just 10.

"hmmm, ", he normally said, walking,

"kia hmmm?, jaldi ku a gaye?", she said taking his bag as he took off his over-coat, Farah was sensing something amiss, he quietly went inside.

Farah went in kitchen, to arrange dinner but her thoughts were in Wali. Farah thought may be he was tired, but he behaved a bit more strange today, may be his job.."OH NO!, kahin job tu nahi chali gayi, tabhi jaldi a gaya hai", she immediately went inside the room, leaving her cooking in between.

She slowly opened the door and Wali was sitting on the couch, very ardently looking at a photo album. Farah knew this album, it was his family's album, she had seen it, but today all of a sudden he took it out. She sat beside him, placing her hand over his shoulder, "Wali"

"I have paid every single penny Farah", he plainly said, rubbing his hands on the pictures, and for a moment Farah couldn't understand, but it was just for a micro-second, "OMG!, really Wali?", she was still in that exquisite state of mind, oscillating between disbelief and belief.

 "haan", he was still looking at the pictures, his mother's picture with him. Farah was really excited, but seeing Wali, all her excitement vanished "maa ki yaad a rahi hai na?", she could sense tears forming in his eyes, she held his hands and placed her head on his shoulder

 "tum itney udaas ku ho Wali?, ye tu khushi ki baat hai tum.."

"plz leave me alone for sometime Farah", he said, turning the next page on album and Farah  was dumbfounded, "ku Wali?, main.."

"plz Farah,", his voice showed that he was adamant on what he said

"main nahi jaon gi, ye kia baat hoyi, ik tu tum itney udaas ho aur..

"Farah for God sake plz!", he closed the album with a force, shocking Farah, "Wali main tu bus'"

"Kia problem hai Farah, ik bar main baat samjh nahi ati hai tumhain?, I don't want to share means I don't want to share!, why the hell don't u just leave  me alone, is it necessary to force me all the time!"

"Wali.."

and before she could complete her sentence, Wali walked out of the room. She just heard the door banging and then she heard the main door bang also, it felt as if her heart was crushed under his foot steps, she  didn't go behind him, because she knew he won't listen anything, her tears started flowing down her cheeks and she sat  down on the sofa, hugging her legs. This was the first time Wali behaved like this with her and she didn't know how to react. His voice was so filled with anger, he shouted at her, she just closed her eyes, just as an attempt to stop his voice collide with her ears again and again. This was supposed to be the happiest day, and what did it turn..

Wali sat on a bench beside the road, again caressing the pictures of his parents, this was the day he so wished his parents could be alive, he wanted them to see that everything was finished, the only problem they faced was finished, he was imagining the smile they could have if they were alive, the relief in their eyes, the satisfaction on their face, and due to this immense pain, there was nothing in his mind, except for the fact that he didn't have the two people with him for whom he worked so hard, all his childhood started flashing in his mind, the warm caresses of his mother and the protective hand of his father, he just hugged the album close to him, as close as  possible, trying to feel the warmth of his parents.

About after three hours he started walking back to his home and as he entered, he re-called what he did with Farah.  He entered in the room and she was sleeping on the sofa, hugging his picture tightly. His heart melted in a moment. The fear of his loud voice was still evident on her face, he could see the frozen tears near her eyes. She just seemed like a kitten cuddling, scared and terrified. He sat beside her, rubbing his hand near her eyes. He carefully picked her up and took her to bed, placing the comforter on her and lying beside her, he slowly took the picture from her hand, and as he took it,  Farah  came out of her weak slumber, but before she could say something or even open her eyes, she sensed Wali hugging her tightly, and he buried his face in her neck.

 Farah was left totally speechless to react, HE WAS SORRY!, she could sense it, the tight hold of his arms, and a tiny tear that fell on her neck was enough for her to understand what he was feeling. His grip was increasing; it felt as if he wanted to give her the assurance that it won't happen again. Tears started to flow out of her eyes too, but she managed to control her sobs, it was as if they both were not able to face each other. Wali was not in a mental state to apologize, and she didn't even want him to.  She just hugged him back, not saying anything, giving an impression that she was still in sleep.

Wali slept soon as she hugged back, it was always this with him, her warm touch was always intoxicating for him, and Farah also wanted to sleep. It was enough emotional turmoil for her.

 Next morning, when she woke up, Wali was already ready for his work, "ab ku kaam karna hai?",she normally started the conversation without any hint of last night. "part time job chor di hai, kuch tu kaam karna pare ga, so I will continue the construction work, until my status gets legal  next month, phir degree k sath khain apply kar lon ga", he said arranging his things and not looking at Farah.

 This was not her Wali, he was never like this, she so wanted to hug him and console, the pain she saw last night was still there, it felt as if the same invisible barrier came in between them again . He left without saying anything further.

 Farah kept on thinking the whole day, thinking about what is lacking??, what went wrong??, she still wasn't able to penetrate through Wali or was it Wali who never let her. What happened last night could have been avoided, only if Farah would have given him some time alone, he surely would have called Farah in the next half an hour, and then he would have placed his head in her lap, slowly talking about all. But she got impatient, it was just she couldn't let Wali sit alone in that vulnerable state. But the problem was she insisted, and Wali hates when he is forced for things, especially when he was so sad,  but he was sorry, he was guilty , but he couldn't apologize, he couldn't look in her eyes. In one morning she had started missing the Wali who used look through her soul with his intense eyes, she had to work it out. His apology came to her and he should know it, it is not his fault only, she was equally guilty. She didn't need his apology, but she had said this all to him several times, she had said so many times that he didn't had to say, but still it was..she closed her eyes..thinking hard what should she do, how should she make him realize that he should not be guilty..she was thinking about every phase of their relation..and there she realized what was lacking.. she opened her eyes!..she couldn't believe they had been avoiding it for so long!

 In the afternoon, Wali was expecting Farah for lunch, but at the same time he was guilty for being rude to her, and he wasn't being able to face her comfortably, he should apologize but he was so poor at expressing this. It was just too difficult. He was taking her for granted, he was always rude to her, always, and she never complained. Even in the morning she was being so sweet. He closed his eyes, thinking he may lose her, it was high time he should accept that relations need assurances, concrete assurances and he even wasn't able to give her the basic assurance of a relation ' HE NEVR EVEN CONFESSED TO HER!. How long would she tolerate, after the initial glorious days of companionship his silence will start cutting the relation, as it had started too, what if he would have spoke to her last night, everything could have been avoided, but the problem is HE DIDN'T WANT TO!,

Even after so much happening, he still wasn't able to convince himself that he should have talked to her, he was adamant that the relation would not last forever because changing his ways was impossible and every time expecting her to compromise was foolish.

He communicated through silence and silence has no meaning, no language it cannot convey, but he was unaware that his silence spoke volumes ..and Farah, in her office, was working on the way she would make him sure of it, making him sure that he had the speaking silence.

Farah came at her exact time and they had their lunch in silence, but Farah was again and again stealing glances at him, she wanted to tell him that his sorry had reached her, but she was content that she had come with a way.

After lunch, she got up to leave, while Wali was still sitting, she placed a letter in his lap, kissed his check  and ran away, "Farah ye..", Wali was shocked at her sudden tactic, but she ran away too  fast, he puzzlingly gazed at the letter and he had no choice but to read it and so he did that:

 My dearest husband,

Tumhain kia lagta hai, mujhe pata nahi chalta hia?, ya mujhe samjh nahi ati hai,do I seem so dumb and stupid to u?, or do u think I am that girly or immature  to ask for apologies from you?

Why didn't u talk to me in the morning in the way u always did? Meri tarf ku nahi dekha?..kia hai Wali?, u think u need to say what u feel?

 I don't need your words Wali, because your eyes, gestures and your touch does that for you and for me..

I know u always think that maybe u don't express properly, or u don't say things to me which I deserve, but u don't know who much your gestures speak to me.

when I hug you on returning home and u kiss my hair, that tells me that u missed me.

When u always try to finish dinner forcefully, it tells me that u don't want to break my heart by pointing out faults in the dinner.

when u eat rice a little more than usual, that tells me that I cooked well.

when u try to tuck my tied hair behind my ears, that tells me that I look beautiful.

when u place your head in my lap, it tells that how peaceful you feel near me.

when u close your eyes on my forehead stoking, it tells how much you me want me ..

when u always hold my hand , it tells me that how much protective you are towards me.

When u look at me Wali, it tell me that you love me, everytime u look at me, your eyes confess to me,

And when u hugged me last night, it told me you were sorry..

U don't need to say anything Wali..because u say it best when u say nothing at all..

and now here are the lyrics  of my all time favourite song..don't worry I will make u listen to its audio also..but for now just the lyrics, because they speak what I want to say..

Its's amazing how you can speak right to my heart

Without saying a word u can light up the dark

Try as we may, we can never explain,

What I hear when u don't say a word.

The smile on your face lets me know that u need me,

There is a truth in your eyes saying u will never leave me

The touch of your hand says you catch me wherever I fall

You say it best when u say nothing at all

All day long I can hear people talking aloud

But when u call my name, u drown out the crowd

Try as we may..I can never define

What's been said between your heart and mine..

 I love you Wali..just the way you are and i love when u don't say a word..

because you say it best when u say nothing at all..

I love you..

Farah Wali Khan

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Farah was walking to home, at her usual time; hoping Wali would have understood what she wanted to say to him. She knew he won't react anything, it will just be a gesture from him that will make her realize that he understood. She thought that today is going to be a romantic evening, and her cheeks turned pink.

 She opened the door, and taking off her sweater, she walked through the small corridor, and as she entered the lounge she was shocked..the whole dining  table was full of rose petals. She quickly ran towards it and  slightly brushing her hands over the petals, her eyes caught an envelope in between, she quickly grabbed it, her heart giving her the indication of whose it could be but the mind warning that you should read first. She opened the envelope and her heart was right, it was Wali's handwriting:

I am not a perfect person,

 there are many things I wish I didn't do, but I continue learning

I never meant to do all those things to you,  

but I just want u to know.

I found out a reason for me, to change what I used to be,

 a reason to start over new and the reason is YOU

I am sorry that I hurt you

That's something I must live with everyday

And all the pain I put you through, I wish I could take it all away

And be the one who catches all your tears

That's what I need you to hear

I found out a reason for me, to change what I used to be

A reason to start over new and the reason is you.

I just want u to know

I found out a reason to show, a side of me you didn't know

A reason for all that I do,

and the reason is YOU..

The reason is you Farah..the reason is YOU..

I love you..

And before the tear in Farah's eye could travel the path down her cheeck, Wali's arms enveloped her waist from back and she felt his whisper in her ear, "I love you"

Farah  closed her eyes and allowed all the tears to slow down with gushing  speed, she felt him kiss her shoulder and she dug her nails deep into his arm skin, "I love u Farah, I love you to infinity", he again said and Farah turned around on his arms to hug him tightly, her eyes were still closed and she pulled him close, as close as it was possible.

They kept standing like that for quite a long while because Farah was just not moving away, Wali tried to move away but she was hugging him very tight, with holding his shirt in her fists, her head buried in his neck and she was quiet. After a few attempts of moving away, he stopped trying and waited until Farah herself would move away. So after sometime he felt her fists opening and her grip slowly loosening she raised her eyes and looked at him with swollen eyes and he slipped his arms across her waist, picked her up and lead to the couch and she snuggled into him as he sat beside, and again she was quiet, she kept her head on his chest with her eyes closed.

"have we reversed roles?", he asked normally and Farah was still quiet.

"Farah, why are u so quiet?"

"I  want to absorb  this moment ", she said as she snuggled more near him, her eyes were still closed.

"but i want to talk", he said in an insisting manner, and Farah raised her head, "I love you Farah", he said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and observing that her eye-pockets were getting wet again, he kissed them, "u know why did I said that u are heading towards fire on the lake that day?", she shook her head in disapproval plainly, and Wali smiled at  her innocence, "because I don't know how to convey the warmth of my heart, it just comes out like fire, burning everything, I don't know how to share and express, I could never even say to my parents how much I love them, I can't even talk to my sister, I just don't know how to do all that, and even with you, I am always stiff, I talk when I want,a and I don't when I don't want, I have just lead life according to what I like, everytime it is just about me!", he was fiddling his fingers with her hair and softly speaking, while Farah was just staring at him, embedding each and every word of his in her heart, "but you made me change, and made me say what I feel, just by giving me the assurance that u even understand what I don't say", he kissed her eyes again, "i am sorry for everything, everytime I,.."and before he could complete his sentence, Farah pressed her lips against his', for a  moment he was caught off guard, but then he kissed back, reciprocating her love and passion.

When she pulled back, she ignored her shyness and looked straight in his eyes, "I told u not to say sorry for anything", her voice was strict and Wali couldn't help smiling, "ok!", she placed her head back on his chest, closing her eyes, "btw what do u think am I that outdated?, I have heard the song, its b Ronan Keating, u don't need to worry about the audio", he said in a bragging tone and Farah started giggling, "mujhe kai pata, I thought u never heard a song in your life, "

"very funny!, have u heard the song I wrote for u?,

"that is a song?, she was amazed, "I thought..

"what?, I have written it?", she nodded and Wali started giggling, "plz haan Farah, itna bhi romantic nahi banaya hai tumne", he said in a mocking tone and Farah hit him on the chest, "it is by  Hoobstank", he said grabbing her hand

"strange, I listen to  Hoobstank a lot, but never heard this one"

"so u were worried about me and u urself haven't heard the song i wrote"

"no need to show  much attitude, I will just bring the laptop", she jumped out of his arms, "hum YouTube pe sunte hian",

"Farah!", Wali was not all interested in listening songs that time and most that Farah went away, but Farah was back with the laptop  in a moment, and she adjusted herself back to her previous position and searched for the song on YT, although Wali wasn't in a mood , but seeing the smile on her face, he forgot about what he wanted, and pulled her more close, "I love you Farah", he whispered somewhere in between the song, "I love you too", she replied snuggling more into him.

Wali & Farah, finally managed to take over each and every single problem in their lives, their pasts, their careers, their families, their apprehensions, their diverse natures, they solved everything.

Finally living happily ever after.

 It was because of their deep, true and unconditioned affection for each other that none of their problems could take over their companionship.

It was because of their love that all the complications in their lives were the magical complications.

The End

 

20. Life is beautiful..

Life was getting beautiful indeed, both of them were filling in the voids they had in their lives. They had learnt how to live with each other's faults and how to cherish each other's qualities, love and companionship.

Farah had  taken over  over the cooking, with Wali being her teacher, well most of the teaching sessions were converted into romantic closeness, but still she managed to learn.

Wali's legal status case in court was progressing well, as his wife was a Canadian passport holder. 

"I am sooo happy k kahin tu main tumhain help kar rahi hon", she frequently used to repeat this sentence and Wali just used to nod.

Farah really didn't know what to do with her salary now?, 

"main soch rahi hon Wali k apne paison k jahaz bana k uraon, what say?, she said ,"hmm..go ahead, then let me know about their flight routes", he said turning to the other side, "very funny!, Wali main apni salary ka kia karon?"

"mujhe kia pata, it's your money, kuch bhi karo"

"Wali tum mujhe ghr ki installemnts dene do..

He sighed turning to her side again, "no thank you,"

"Wali kia problem hai! sab log kaam karte hain, just for the reason k burden thora kam ho, aur main fazool kam karti hon, u don't let me help anywhere, kia faida itni exertion ka, main ghr beth jati hon, I am leaving my job", she said all of this in one breath,, turning to the other side, she was totally convinced that Wali won't let her help anywhere,"ok fine, installments tum de dena", and his voice was so unexpected, as always!, "really Wali, I mean tum ne sach main mujhe..

"ik aur baar confirm kiya tu decision reverse kar don ga!', he strictly said and closed his eyes, while farah kissed his check, "thank you, ab tu tum ziyada jaldi debts finish kar ..

And Wali opened his eyes giving her an angry glare, "ok ok sorry, nahi baat karti, so jao",she placed her hand over his eyes and Wali just couldn't help his heart flow over her innocence.

Wali was the same quiet types, but farah did speak of his part, she was now getting used to his ways, and she loved the way he was. She never did demand anything from him, because she knew that was not his nature.

Maynak was lying with his head in farah's lap, and farah was stroking his hair and simultaneously reading a novel, she had the novel in one hand and her other hand was  stroking Wali's hair. Wali was sensing that her concentration was more towards the novel, initially he decided to ignore, but compromising had always been difficult for him, he opened his eyes as her hand movements completely stopped and her eyes were glued to the book.

 Farah was totally engrossed in the novel, it was going through an interesting turn, she was feeling her pulse rise with every word, the protagonist was about to find out the killers of her husband.

She ran through the names on the list, each and every name was unfamiliar, except for that name, she couldn't believe he could be the one who killed her husband, she read the name aloud.. it was..

And the book closed

"Waliii!!"

She was left dumbfounded when Wali took the book form her hands and closed it, he looked at her, with his head still in her lap,"what?", his tone was normal, "you very well know I hate when your attention is diverted", he said and closed his eyes again and farah was just staring him in disbelief, "Wali plz, just two lines more, wo .."

He opened his eyes and farah felt as if she lost all her words because his eyes had such a strict expression, "you prefer to read?", his voice was stiff, strict and commanding. She slightly shook her head in disapproval, 'good", he closed his eyes again and farah's lips broke into a smile, she slowly started  stroking his hair again. She could sense the contentment on his face, she loved when he was authoritative with her, she loved when he commanded with the assurance that he had full right over her, she loved when he behaved like a typical demanding husband. She never got angry on all of this, because his commanding showed his love, his affection and the feeling of assurance that his wife will never back off from showering affection on him. Soon he slept, but farah didn't read the book again, she kept on stroking his hair until she fell  asleep herself.

Life was getting beautiful, with destiny playing its part in their relation as always, they both were there for each other, farah announcing this fact and Wali's silent assurances, but whenever they fell short, it was destiny there for them.

Wali returned home at about 11, "aj jaldi kaise a gaye?", farah asked while they were having dinner, "the subway was to close after 12, repair hona tha, so I came early",.

 They finished dinner and farah got busy in the kitchen, Wali came in the room. Farah's files scattered on the table, he pushed them all away to place his watch and wallet, when an envelope fell down, he was about to place it back but he read the words HAPPY BIRTHDAY FARAH on it. He was stunned, he opened the card immediately and it was from her colleague, he took out her id card from the drawer, reading her birth date, it was today!! 3^rd January!!.. he glanced at the clock and it was 11.45, he still had 15 minutes. He smiled with disbelief, destiny at its work!

Farah was in the lounge and just placing some bills in the shelf when she was hugged from back,"happy birthday", her hands stopped midway in placing papers, she turned in his arms, seeing him in disbelief, "kia?", Wali started giggling seeing the shock in her eyes, so he kissed her cheek, "happy birthday!", the shock was still evident, "tumhain pata tha??', but her voice was jubilant and eyes started sparkling and at that time Wali cursed himself for not knowing it, "nahi, I read your card", he said, and suddenly farah's excitement faded a bit and Wali felt guilty, "I am sorry for it, btw tum ne ku nahi bataya?, the whole day u  talk non-stop!", he tried to cheer her up, "aisey hi, I was..

"shy?", he chuckled and farah hugged him blushing, "yes and thank you, and u don't need to be sorry," farah expected him to say something more but he left her and went to his drawer in the lounge, "that was rude", she spoke in rage as she didn't expect him to leave her like this, that too on her birthday, she turned to the shelf  when  he again hugged her, this time grabbing her hand, "choro mera hath," she was still angry but was amazed when he slipped a ring in her finger, "happy birthday farah, I cherish the day u came in this world, just to make my life beautiful," he said and kissed the finger with the ring, farah was just speechless to react to what he said, , "ye ring maa ki hai, I don't have anything precious than this", he said brushing his thumb over the ring and farah was just trying to adjust words , "Wali! Tum..!", she spoke in a voice broken due to tears of joy and hugged him tightly, she didn't know what to say more, she just hugged him and seeing the ring with teary eyes, " btw if u allow me than I need to give some other gifts also", she pulled herself back and  saw the typical twinkle in his eyes and understood his other gifts, "no thank you, waise bhi its 12, my birthday is over," she said looking at the time piece on the shelf, "as if I care", Wali said and placed the clock upside down, and before farah could say anything she was picked up in his arms.

Farah never gave up; she still always pushed him to speak about his past. It was not that Wali wanted to hide something, it was just he didn't want to talk. He didn't want to transfer his painful past to his sensitive and emotional wife, but not knowing that his wife could make his rough decisions reverse just by her one imploring look.

"Wali, coffee", she quietly placed the cup on the table and adjusted herself near him, placing her head on his shoulder, "do u mind giving me some privacy?", Wali said closing his book.

"yes I do", she cuddled more close to him, "farah you are being a kid now", he said again but farah took no notice, he lifted her chin and looked in her eyes. Farah opened them wide.

Wali was working on his accounts and whenever he used to do it, farah used to silently come near him.

Today she saw the same strict expression in his eyes and she moved away, but what Wali saw today was different. Everytime before, her eyes used to show anger but today he saw her getting disheartened.

Farah was really disheartened, she couldn't understand why wasn't she allowed to look in his affairs, she slipped in the covers  and closed her eyes firmly, with a tiny tear coming out, but soon she felt a kiss on her check, "parh lo, but don't question", he placed the book in front of her and turned to other side. Farah got up immediately, she was shocked, but at the same time happy, she was not curious , she was concerned.

She read the book, it was his accounts of the last five years. It was really huge amount, it was not only debts, but he also had to support his home, the money he spent here. So much of his money was on interest, and the first 3 years he was just paying interests, his real debt money was started 2 years back, and he was right, it was really about to finish. Her tears started flowing and she closed the book, and obeying to his command, she didn't say a word, just hugged him.

Although Wali was silent all the time, but he knew when and how to make farah happy, and he knew what mattered the most for her.

Wali entered home and held farah's hand, "I need to show you something,"

"kahan Wali?', she dropped the spoon, "bus chalo," they were about to step out of home,"Wali let me change atleast,", she stopped staring him in disbelief,

"jaldi karo, just 5 minutes"

"Wali lekin.."

"jaldi karo farah"

"you are just impossible", she went inside stamping her feet and retuned in about 5 minutes, dressed in a jeans and sweater, "jaldi karo", Wali held her hand and they stepped out of house, the weather was very chilly, "Wali itni sardi main kahan le k ja rahe ho?, but Wali was quiet and as farah was quite used to his shocks till now, she kept on walking silently.

Wali stopped in between a road and farah looked at him in a puzzled way , "kia hia?"

Wali stood behind her and slightly lifted her chin and she saw something which stunned her. She was speechless and ecstatic.

"OH MY GOD!",

 the white cloth gushed down the hoarding and it was the banner of HER add!. She had just approved these designs the last week, and she knew they were to be put up around the city, but this was the exact time, it was being put up!. "I wanted you to witness your work first", he slowly said and farah came out of her banner and looked at Wali who smiled lightly, "I don't believe this Wali ", she hugged him, " thank u soo much".

After a couple of minutes he broke from the hug, "chalen ghr?", Wali asked and she looked at the banner again, trying to capture it in her eyes, it looked gorgeous in the moonlight and dark,"hmm", she nodded and they started walking back to their home, farah slipped her arm in his arm, holding his hand tightly, "tumhain kaisey pata chala Wali k ye display ho raha  hai?'

'Jab ghr a raha that u I heard these people talking about putting up the Stevenson's adds for display"

"oh! Ummm..tumhain kaisa laga Wali?', she asked

"I told you I like everything about you", he said normally and farah smiled contently, she was used to his silence and she vowed to herself that she will never let his silence come in between their relation, he was just the perfect person for her and his one fault won't affect their relation, she vowed increasing her grip over his hand, not knowing that she will have to prove all this soon.

Pyar kiya tu nibhana..

 

19. Pillow talk..

Wali was sleeping, his hands under his head, and he was facing her side. She carefully climbed on the bed, making sure he was not disturbed and lying very close to him, she started rubbing her fingers over his forehead, and kept looking at him.

She never looked at him for so long; his eyes always made her blush, but today, as he was sleeping, so she caught hold of the opportunity of endlessly admiring him. She was rubbing her fingers, and slightly ruffling his hair, thinking about the unexpected and beautiful turn her life had taken.

After rubbing her fingers for a while, she removed her hand, when Wali held it and Farah was taken off guard, "I am sorry, main ne tumhain utha diya na", she said as he opened his eyes,"I was awake", he entwined his fingers with hers', "awake?, tu itni dair se..", she sounded shocked, but Wali was looking at their entwined hands. They both were almost on the edge of their own pillows, facing each other and their hands were on the little space between them. Farah sensed the affection radiating from his finger's rub against her hands,  , "your hands are so warm", he spoke after a while, grabbing her hand again, and she smiled, "hmm, and ur hands are so rough and stiff", she cheekily said, holding his hand back, "I know, may be because of the work I do", he started tracing  lines of her palm with his fingers, and at that time Farah really looked at his hands, they WERE stiff and hard, before she just said spontaneously, but it was real, she immediately rubbed her fingers over his hand,"Wali agey inti sardi ho jaye gi, it will start snowfalling, tab bhi yehi contruction ka kaam karo gey?', she asked in a worried voice looking him, but he was still looking at their hands, "hmmm", and Farah thought her heart was caught in a fist, "kia hmmmm?, can't u do some other work?, hands go numb at freezing temperature Wali, kaise kaam karo gey?', her voice was strict and worried, "I am doing it for the past five years, I am used to it", he said as he traced her finger knuckles with his thumb, and Farah didn't know what to say more, "Wali", her voice was breaking a bit, and Wali looked at her for a moment, "when will your debts finish?", she asked in a soft voice and Wali kept on rubbing his hands over her upper side of the hand, "I will tell you when they  finish"

"ye kia baat hoyi? I want to know NOW!, and I have full right to know!", she tried sounding authoritative but the concern was evident and Wali was not paying attention to what she was saying, he had found a small scratch on the junction of her thumb and palm and was now rubbing his fingers over it.

"ye scratch kaisey aya?, kal tu nahi tha?", he asked as his fingers were constantly rubbing it.

"office main paper cutter lag gaya tha", she answered in stiff voice, but unable to hold the joy she felt when he asked, he gently kissed her scratch and Farah blushed deeply but she decided not to get carried away, "Wali plz batao mujhe", she said again but Wali's facial expressions showed he was in no mood to answer, he wasn't even looking at her, he was just admiring her hands,"Wali main tum se baat kar rahi hon!", this time she was really irritated and she was about to pull her hand from his grip when he held it more tightly, digging his fingers in her skin,"plz ye mat karna Farah", he said looking at her with a vulnerably in his eyes, and she held his hand back, "then share your problem Wali plz,

"kia pochna hai?'

"when will ur debts finish?"

"I have been working for 5 years, tumhain kia lagta hai kitne reh gaye hongey?

"ummm..thore hi reh gaye hon gey?", she said searching his face and he nodded, and Farah got furious on his nodding.

"you are just so irritating, main poch rahi hon  kitney thore reh gaye hain?"

"itney thorey k maybe I will be leaving my part time job in the next two months."

"wow!, tu Wali meri salary se bhi.."

"Farah ye mera problem hai, and let me handle it alone"

"oh so now u will behave like a 18^th century husband, Wali plz don't be so narrow-minded", she said, grabbing his hand more firmly.

"I have worked so hard to finish them, and now when I have reached the end, I don't want to take anyone's help.

"I am not anyone, I am your wife,

"haan tu main ne kab mana kiya hai, you are my wife,", he looked at her with a naughty smile, with fingers still tracing out every single line of her palms.

"that was not funny, Wali dekho..

"listen Farah, you don't understand!, I want to complete all with my own hardwork, , I don't care if I am narrrow minded or whatever, I want to complete it on my own..you don't understand what my parents had to go through

"Wali until and unless u won't tell me tu mujhe kaise pata chaley ga, u will need to share na..

" main is sab k bare main khud se bhi baat nahi karta hon"

"and what is that supposed to mean?"

"all of that is finished, and there is no need to talk about all that

"Wali that is not fair.."

She entwined her hands more firmly, waiting he would say something, or realize that she really wanted to talk about all that,  "Wali"

"Farah" he brought her hands to his lips and kissed it, "can we talk about something else plz, don't worry, I am fine aur  ab tu sab khatam honey wala hai, relax"

Farah looked at him ardently but the look in his eyes was so determined that she knew she won't be able to insist more, she decided to wait, maybe he would tell.

"ok, I called diya in the morning, she is so sweet, so UNLIKE you", she said in a displeased tone, grabbing his hand tightly, as an attempt to hurt him, and he giggled, "are ur ears alright?'

"ku?"

"nahi, actually she screams on phone", he said plainly and this made Farah laugh, "very funny, she is just excited and she is such a sweetheart" and Wali was happy seeing her smile, "btw main ne us ko pictures bhi bhejn hain apni, I hope she likes them"

"be sure of it", he said looking up at him an she just smiled, "umm..Wali, main aur kuch pochon?'

"ab kia hai?'

"ummm..did u ever had girl friends?, she said searching his face and Wali giggled, "u really need to ask me?", he said

"ummm, nahi, waise hi main'"

"I never had a girlfriend, but yes I was proposed a lot of times, and plz now I don't remember about all those girls so don't expect me to give their bio-datas to you", he said in a teasing tone, and Farah couldn't help smiling, "very funny!, I have a right to know about my husband's past life!", she said normally, but Wali sensed something missing, he looked in her eyes, noticing her eye-pockets getting wet., "and u also have a right to know about my past life, tumhain koi sawaal nahi karna hai Wali?', she said in a very low tone and Wali plainly looked at her, "I would have, if I had too", he closed his eyes, grabbing her hands firmly. "how did u come to know about my drinking habit Wali?", she finally came to her real point, Wali understood that she was talking about past life just to initiate this discussion, "why are u talking abt things I don't want to?', he opened his eyes and time his voice was angry, "Wali plz, ye tu bata do, it is very strange for me, main ne kabhi nahi bataya tu tumhain  kaise pata chala?", and tears rolled down her cheeks, Wali pulled her in his arms, and she cuddled close to him, 'plz Wali", he felt her tears on his neck, 'u know where I work part-time?"

"Wali plz main kia poch rahi hon..

"I work at the Weston road club, I have seen u drinking", he said plainly and Farah raised her head from his neck, she was never amazed at this extreme before, and he tucked her hair behind her ears, "Wali tum.."

"I have seen u cursing you yourself to loose your senses, I have seen you surrendering to shehna's pleading, i have seen you regretting your choices, I have seen you in search of one reason to stay away from drinks, and I have seen you moving away from that darkness", 

He spoke plainly and she just looked into his eyes and unable to say something, she slowly placed her head back on his chest, cuddling more close to him, just allowing tears to flow down. "Farah if I don't talk about all of this then isn't it enough to show that I care a damn", he said as his grip around her shoulders increased.

This was one thing Farah was deeply embarrassed off, she always wanted to tear that chapter out of her life, and seeing the attitude of Wali towards all of this made her heart go light of every burden. "you don't realize what this all means to me" she spoke in a very weak voice,

"u were better in the kitchen", he said tilting his head a bit but on hearing this Farah raised her head immediately, "kia mtlb?"

"u were very quiet in the kitchen yesterday, aj bht bol rahi ho!", he said moving close to her  and  last night came in front of her, making her blush deeply, and she placed her head back on his chest.

"tumhain pata hai k u are the most romantic husband of this world", she said playing with the buttons of his shirt, "pata hai", he said and Farah again raised her head, 'acha g!.."

" haan! well I am the most romantic husband , because I have the most beautiful and shy wife of this world." he said tracing the border line of a strand of hair on her face and Farah smiled and buried her head again in his neck.

"BY GOD!", main ne kabhi socha bhi nahi tha k tum asiey ho gey!"

"kaisa?"

"romantic!, u make me blush like hell", she said again blushing.

" Wo ku?

"kia ku?, mujh se baat bhi ki tum ne kabhi, shaadi k baad tu u have completely turned, "

"main ne kabhi baat nahi ki because I had no right over you, and I don't like to build false hopes, you had every reason to reject me, "

"aur jo unexpected proposal tha, wo tu araam se de diya tha, giving me an almost heart attack", she giggled and Wali smiled, "tab baat aur thi, when had kissed", and Farah lowered her eyes, "don't blush, listen to me", he raised her cheek and she was turning crimson red, "I realized that if I could let go off my rational side so easily with you, than I had to bring you in my life, further denial was not possible, so I asked you for marriage, simple!

 " there is no one like you in this world", she said placing her head on his chest. "I think u are in a mood to sleep now", Wali spoke up and she immediately raised her head again, "nahi mian.."

"kia nahi?, u are in a mood of something else?", he looked at her and she blushed, her eyes were  a bit swollen, "good night Farah, we both have work tomorrow, aj k liye bht batien ho gayi hain" he smiled lightly and she placed her head back on her chest, snuggling into his neck and he kissed her eye-lash, both of them welcoming sleep soon.